8 January 1868 • Washington, D.C. (MS: CCamarSJ, UCCL 00174)
It is singular that the battle of New Orleans1explanatory note & St Valentine’s Day both come on the same day this year—singular is too tame a word—it is positively astounding. However, that isn’t wat what ⒶemendationI was going to write about.
I am a thousand times obliged to you for that most charmingly worded Ⓐemendationletter. You have not listened to Mr. Beecher & marked his felicity of expression for nothing. I am not saying these things because I think they will be news to you, for they will not, or because I was surprised that you should write an excellent letter, for I was not, but because it is easier to say what is in one’s mind than to leave it unsaid.
And while I think of it, Miss Emma, I wish you would—well, never mind—it would be putting you to too much trouble. I am trying my best to write so that you can read the manuscript, but I am not succeeding very well. I have been up all night writing a lecture which I is Ⓐemendationto be delivered to-morrow evening, & now my fire is out, & the gray dawn is chilly, & my hand is unsteady with cold & fatigue. But I shall be very busy to-morrow Ⓐemendation& the next day (when I am to lecture again,) & I must thank you for writing.2explanatory note People don’t like to have their self-complacency touched, you know, & I did feel so ridiculous in church last Sunday for writing a Valentine to a young lady, there present, who hadn’t taken any notice of it! I am very grateful that that humiliation is removed, I do assure you.3explanatory note
With enormous effrontery, I have entitled my lecture “The Frozen Truth. !” How will that strike Mrs. Beach?4explanatory note It has got just about as much truth in it h as it has poetry—& you may reprove me for that, now, & I won’t get angry {but if that chambermaid don’t quit hammering at that door, I’ll make her jump out of the window—I wonder if she thinks I am the early bird that catches the worm.} Chambermaids are absurd people. I hate the whole tribe of them. I wouldn’t want any better fun than writing obituaries for chambermaids. them. ⒶemendationBut I am wandering from my subject. I am going to send Mr. Beecher my book5explanatory note as soon as I recover from this rush of business. I was going to hand it to Mr. Beach in New York, but I had so many things to do that I could not attend to it. I am going to send Mrs. Beach one, also, so that she can see that I can tell the truth in print when I brace myself up to it.
When you see Capt. Duncan I wish you would tell him how busy I am, getting ready to tell the truth to-morrow night; I told him I would be present at his lecture this evening, but now I shall not be able to do it. Never mind—I WILL go & hear him to-night. 6explanatory note I did not know that I was to lecture, myself, until I was informed of it at 10 o’clock last night. If I were unoccupied, I would run about town & canvas for the Captain to-day. It wouldn’t help his pocket any, but lecturers always like to have a crowded house.
You do say the naivest things that ever anybody said in the world, & hit the hardest possible hits, in the most comfortable way—but I like it. Your reproofs are so honest, & so pleasant, withal, that I really can’t help feeling a strong desire to deserve more of them! But I will conquer it & try to behave myself. I won’t make fun of the prayer-meetings any more. But the idea of my “reproving you in return” won’t do at all. I don’t know anything to reprove you about. I don’t know anything except to reprove you for your curious notion of offending me with a long letter. Nothing is pleasanter to me than to be offended in that way, & I shall reprove you very severely if you don’t do it again. I shall be ever so much obliged to you if you will sit down now & proceed to offend me awfully.
What was it I put on that envelop that suggested that Mrs. Beach was the principal of a boarding school? What in the world could it have been? What do you ask such conundrums for, & then not send the answer? I only wrote “Miss Emma Beach, 66 Columbia Street, Brooklyn, N. Y.”—that was all. Now tell me what it was that put that notion in your head?
I have searched everywhere for my photographs, but I cannot find a single one. I must have put them away somewhere very carefully—& when I put anything away, I never can find it again. Still, I will institute another search, & will find a picture & send it to you. Those Constantinople pictures were very bad, though. I might almost as well send you a photograph of the Sphynx—it would look as much like me.7explanatory note
I got a good long letter from Mrs. Fairbanks, yesterday,—just such a bright, pleasant letter as that most excellent woman always writes.
Come, Miss Emma, send me some more ref reproofsⒶemendation, & upon my word I will do all I can to profit by them—do you note my address?
The final engagement of the War of 1812 occurred on this day in 1815.
See the previous letter, n. 7.
Beach evidently did not reply to Clemens’s letter of 5 December until after they met at Henry Ward Beecher’s on Sunday, 5 January: see the previous letter.
Chloe Buckingham Beach, originally from Waterbury, Connecticut, married Moses S. Beach in 1845.
The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County.
Captain Duncan repeated his Quaker City lecture (first given on 3 December in Brooklyn and again on 26 December in New York) for a Washington audience in Metzerott Hall on 8 January (advertisement, Brooklyn Eagle, 24 Dec 67, 1; advertisement, Washington National Intelligencer, 8 Jan 68, 3).
The photograph of Clemens taken in Constantinople is reproduced on p. 92.
MS, Estelle Doheny Collection, The Edward Laurence Doheny Memorial Library, St. John’s Seminary, Camarillo, Calif. (CCamarSJ).
L2 , 147–149; Booth, 221–23; Christie, lot 1186, excerpts.
see Doheny Collection, pp. 511–12.
More information on provenance may be found in Description of Provenanceclick to open link.