14 November 1879 • Chicago, Ill. (MS, in pencil: CU-MARK, UCCL 01715)
A little after 5 in the morning.
I’ve just come to my room. Livy darling, I guess this was the memorable night of my life. By George, I never was so stirred since I was born. I heard four speeches which I can never forget. One by Emory Storrs, one by Gen. Vilas (O, wasn’t it wonderful!) one by Gen. Logan (mighty stirring), one by somebody whose name escapes me, & one by that splendid old soul, Col. Bob Ingersoll,—oh, it was just the supremest combination of English words that was ever put together since the world began. My soul, how handsome he looked, as he stood on that table, in the midst of those 500 shouting men, & poured the molten silver from his lips! Lord, what an organ is human speech when it is played by a master! All these speeches may look dull in print, but how the lightnings glared around them when they were uttered, & how the crowd roared in response! Ah, It was a great night, a marvelous night, a memorable night. I am so richly repaid for my journey—& how I did long wish with all my whole heart that you were there to be lifted into the very seventh heaven of enthusiasm, as I was. The army songs, the military music, the crashing applause—Lord bless me, it was unspeakable.
Out of compliment they placed me last in the list—No. 15—I was to “hold the crowd”—& bless my life I was in awful terror when No. 14 rose at 2 o’clock this morning & killed all the enthusiasm by delivering the flattest, insipidest, silliest of all responses to “Woman” that ever a weary multitude listened to. There wasn’t a sign of applause & the man ended almost in funereal silence. Then Gen. Sherman (Chairman) announced my toast, & the crowd gave me a good round of applause as I mounted on top of the dinner tafble, but it was only on account of my name, nothing moreⒶemendation,—they were all tired & wretched. They let my first sentence go in silence, till I paused & added “we stand on common ground”—then they burst forth like a hurricane & I saw that I had them! From that time on, I stopped at the end of each sentence, & let the tornado of applause & laughter sweep around me.—& when I closed with “And if the child is but the prophecy of the man, there are mighty few will doubt that he succeeded,” I say it who oughtn’t to say it, the house came down with a crash. For two hours & a half, now, I’ve been shaking hands & listening to congratulations. Gen. Sherman said, “Lord bless you, my boy, I don’t know how you do it—it’s a secret that’s beyond me—but it was marvelous—but great—give me your hand again.”—I wouldnt
And do you know, Gen. Grant sat through fourteen speeches like a graven image, but I fetched him! I broke him up, utterly! He told me he told me he laughed till the tears came & every bone in his body ached. (And do you know, the biggest part of the success of the speech lay in the fact that the audience saw that for once in his life he had been knocked out of his iron serenity.)
Bless your soul, ’twas immense. I never was so proud in my life. Lots & lots of people—hundreds, I might say—told me my speech was the triumph of the evening—which was a lie. Ladies, Tom, Dick & Harry—even the policemen—captured me in the halls & shook hands, & scores of army officers said “Whe shall always be right do grateful to you for coming.” General Pope came to hunt me up—I was afraid to speak to him on that theatre stage, last night, thinking itn might be presumptuous to tackle a man so high up in military history. Gen. Schofield, & other historic men, paid their compliments. Sheridan was ill & could not come, but I’m to go with a General of his staff & see him before I go to Col. Grant’s. Gen. Augur—well, I’ve talked with them all, received invitations from them all—from people living everywhere—& as I said before, it’s a memorable night. I wouldn’t have missed it for anything in the world.
But my sakes, you should have heard Ingersoll’s! H speech on that table! Half an hour ago he ran across me in the crowded halls & put his arms about me & said “Mark, if I live a hundred years, I’ll always be grateful for that your speech—Lord what a supreme thing it was!” But I told him it wasn’t any use to talk, he had walked off with the honors of that occasion by something of a majority. Bully boy is Ingersoll—traveled with him in the cars the other day, & you can make up your mind we had a good time.
Of course I forgot to go & pay for my hotel car & so secure it, but the army officers told me an while hour ago to rest easy, they would go at once, at this unholy hour of the night & compel the railways to do their duty by me, & said “You don’t need to request the Army of the Tennessee to do your desires—you can command its services.”
Well, I bummed around that banquet hall from 8 in the evening till 2 in the morning, talking with people & listening to speeches, & I never ate a single bite or took a sup of anything but ice water; so if I seem excited now, it is the intoxication of supreme enthusiasm. By george, it was a grand night, a historical night.
And now it is a quarter past 6 A.M.—so good bye & God bless you & the Bays, my darlings.
Show it to Joe if you want to—I saw some of his friends here.
MS, in pencil, CU-MARK.
MTL , 1:370–73; MicroML, reel 4.
See Mark Twain Papers in Description of Provenanceclick to open link.