[begin page 428]

Home again, at Camelot. A morning or two later I foundⒶalteration in the MS the paper, damp from the press, by my plate at the breakfast table. I turned to the advertising columns, knowing I should find something of personal interest to me there. It was this:

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Clarence’s editorial reference to this affair was to this effect:

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Up to the day set,Ⓐalteration in the MS there was no talk in all BritainⒶemendation of anything but this combat. All other topics sankⒶrejected substantive into insignificanceⒶalteration in the MS and passed out of men’s thoughts and interest. It was not because a tournament was a great matter; it was not because Sir Sagramour had found the Holy Grail, for he had not, but had failed; it was not because the second (official)Ⓐalteration in the MS personage in the kingdom was one of the duelists; no, all these features were commonplace. Yet there was abundant reason for the extraordinary interest which this comingⒶalteration in the MS fight was creating. It was born of the fact that all the nation knew that this was not to be a duel between mereⒶalteration in the MS men, so to speak, but a duel between two mighty magicians; a duel not of muscle but of mind, not of human skill but of super human art and craft; a final struggle for supremacyⒶalteration in the MS between the two master enchanters of the age.Ⓐalteration in the MS It was realized that the most prodigious achievements of the most renowned knights could not be worthy of comparison with a spectacle like this; they could be but child’s-play, contrasted with this mysterious and awful battle of the gods. Yes, all the world knew it was going to be in reality a duel between Merlin and me, a measuring of his magic powers against mine. It was known that Merlin had been busy whole days and nightsⒶalteration in the MS together, imbuing Sir Sagramour’s arms and armorⒶemendation with supernal powers of offence and defence,Ⓐalteration in the MS and that he had procured for him from the spirits of the air a fleecy veil which would render the wearer invisible to his antagonist while still visible to otherⒶalteration in the MS men.Ⓐalteration in the MS Against Sir Sagramour, so weaponed and protected, a thousand knights could accomplish nothing; against him no known enchantments could prevail. These facts were sure; regarding them there was no doubt, no reasonⒶemendation for doubt. There was but one question: might there be still other enchantments, unknown to Merlin, which could render Sir Sagramour’s veil transparent to me, and make his enchanted mail vulnerable to my weapons? This was the one thing to be decided in the lists. Until then the world mustⒶalteration in the MS remain in suspense.

So the world thought there was a vast matterⒶalteration in the MS at stake here, and the world was right; but it wasⒶalteration in the MS not the one they had in their minds. No, a far vaster one was upon the cast of this die: the life of knight-errantry Ⓐemendation Ⓐalteration in the MS. I was a champion, it was true, but not the champion of the frivolous black arts, I was the champion of hard, unsentimentalⒶemendation, common-senseⒶalteration in the MS and reason. I was entering the lists to eitherⒶrejected substantive destroy knight-errantryⒶemendation or beⒶrejected substantive its victim.

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Vast as the show-grounds were, there were no vacant spaces in themⒶalteration in the MS outside of the lists, at ten o’clock on the morning of the 16th. The mammoth grand stand wasⒶalteration in the MS clothed in flags, streamers, and rich tapestries, and packed with several acresⒶalteration in the MS of small-fry tributary kings,Ⓐalteration in the MS their suitesⒶemendation, and the BritishⒶalteration in the MS aristocracy, with our own royal gang in the chief place, and each and every individual a flashing prism of gaudy silks and velvets—well, I never saw anything to begin with it but a fight between an Upper Mississippi sunset and the aurora borealis.Ⓐalteration in the MS The huge campⒶalteration in the MS of beflagged and gay-colored tents at oneⒶalteration in the MS end of the lists, with a stiff-standing sentinelⒶemendation Ⓐrejected substantive at every door, and a shining shield hanging by him for challenge, was another fine sight. You see, every knight was there who had any ambition or any caste feeling; for myⒶalteration in the MS feeling towardⒶrejected substantive their order was not much of a secret, and so here was their chance.Ⓐalteration in the MS If I won my fight with Sir Sagramour, others would have the right to call me out as long as I might be willing to respond.

Down at our end there were but two tents; one for me, and another for my servants.Ⓐalteration in the MS At the appointed hour the king made a sign, and the heralds, in theirⒶalteration in the MS tabards, appeared and made proclamation, namingⒶalteration in the MS the combatants and stating the cause of quarrel. There was a pause, then a ringing bugle blast, which was the signal for us to come forth.Ⓐalteration in the MS All the multitude caught their breath, and an eager curiosity flashed into every face.

Out from hisⒶrejected substantive tent rode great Sir Sagramour, an imposing tower of iron, stately and rigid, his huge spear standing upright in its socket and grasped in his strong hand, his grand horse’s face and breast cased in steel, his body clothed in rich trappings that almost dragged the ground—oh, a most noble picture!Ⓐemendation A great shout went up, of welcome and admiration.

And then out I came. But I didn’t get any shout. There was a wondering and eloquent silence, for a moment, thenⒶrejected substantive a great wave of laughter began to sweepⒶalteration in the MS along that human sea, but a warning bugle blastⒶemendation cut its career short. I was inⒶrejected substantive Ⓐtextual note the simplest and comfortablest of gymnastⒶalteration in the MS costumes—flesh-colored tights from neck to heel, with blue silk puffings about my loins, and bare-headed. My horse was not above medium size, but he was alert, slender-limbed, muscled with watch-springs, and just a greyhound to go. He was a beauty; glossy as silk, and naked as he was when he was born, except for bridle and ranger-saddle.Ⓐalteration in the MS

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TheⒶalteration in the MS iron tower and the gorgeous bed-quilt came cumbrously butⒶalteration in the MS gracefully pirouettingⒶalteration in the MS down the lists, and we tripped lightly up to meet them.Ⓐemendation Ⓐalteration in the MS We halted; the tower saluted, I responded; then we wheeled and rode side by side to the grand stand and faced our king and queenⒶrejected substantive, to whom we made obeisance. The queen exclaimed:

“Alack, Sir Boss, wilt fight naked, and without lance or sword or—”

But the king checkedⒶalteration in the MS her and made her understand, with a polite phrase or two, that this was none of her business. The bugles rang again, and we separated and rode to the ends of the lists, and took position. Now old Merlin stepped into view, and cast a dainty web of gossamer threadsⒶalteration in the MS over Sir SagramourⒶalteration in the MS which turned him into Hamlet’s ghost; the king made a sign, the bugles blew, Sir Sagramour laid his great lance in rest, and the next moment here he came thundering down the course, with his veil flying out behind, and I wentⒶalteration in the MS whistling through the air like an arrow to meet him—cocking my ear, the while, as if noting the invisible knight’s position and progress by hearing, not sight.Ⓐemendation A chorus of encouraging shouts burst out for him, and one brave voice flung out a heartening word for me—said:

“Go it, Slim Jim!”

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It was an even bet that Clarence had procured that favor for me—and furnished the language, too. When that formidable lance-point was within a yard and a half of my breast I twitched my horse aside without an effort and the big knight swept by, scoring a blank.Ⓐalteration in the MS I got plenty of applause that time. We turned, braced up, and down we came again. Another blankⒶalteration in the MS for the knight, a roar of applause for me. This same thing was repeated once more; and it fetched such a whirlwind of applause that Sir Sagramour lost his temper, and at once changed his tactics and set himself the task of chasing me down. Why, he hadn’t any show in the world at that; it was a game of tag, with all the advantagesⒶrejected substantive Ⓐtextual note on my side; I whirled out of his path with ease whenever I chose, and once I slapped him on the back as I went to the rear. Finally I took the chase into my own hands, and after that, turn, or twist, or do what he would, he was never able to get behind me again, he found himself always in front, at the end of his maneuverⒶemendation. So he gave up that business and retired to his end of the lists. His temper was clear gone, now, and he forgot himself and flung an insult at me which disposed of mine. I slipped myⒶalteration in the MS lasso from the horn of my saddle, and grasped the coil in my right hand. This time you should have seen him come!—it was a business trip, sure; by his gait, there was blood in his eye. I was sittingⒶalteration in the MS my horse atⒶalteration in the MS ease, and swinging the great loop of my lasso in wide circles about my head; the moment he was under way, I started for him; when the space between us had narrowed to forty feet, I sent the snaky spirals of the rope a-cleaving through the air, then darted aside and faced about and brought my trained animal to a halt with all his feet braced under him for a surge. The next moment the rope sprangⒶrejected substantive taught, and yanked Sir Sagramour out of the saddle! Great Scott, but there was a sensation!

Unquestionably, the popular thing in this world is novelty. These people had never seen anythingⒶemendation of that cow-boy business before, and it carried them clear off their feet with delight. From all around and everywhere, the shout went up—

“Encore! encore!”

I wondered where they got the word, but there was no time to cipher on philological matters, because the wholeⒶalteration in the MS knight-errantry hive was just humming, now, and my prospect for trade couldn’t have been better. The moment my lasso was released and Sir Sagramour had beenⒶalteration in the MS assistedⒶalteration in the MS to his tent, I hauled in the slack, tookⒶalteration in the MS my [begin page 434]

[begin page 435] station and began to swing my loop around my head againⒶalteration in the MS. I was sureⒶalteration in the MS to have use for it as soon as they could elect a successor for Sir Sagramour, and that couldn’t take long where there were so many hungry candidates. Indeed, they elected one straight off—Sir Hervis de Revel.

Bzz! Ⓐalteration in the MS Here he came, like a house afire; I dodged; he passed like a flash, with my horse-hairⒶemendation coilsⒶalteration in the MS settling around his neck; a second or so later, fst! his saddle was empty.

I got another encore; and another, and another, and still another. When I had snaked five men out, things began to look serious to the iron-clads,Ⓐalteration in the MS and they stopped and consulted together. As a result, they decided that it was time to waive etiquette and send their greatest and best against me. To the astonishment of that little world, I lassoed Sir LamorakⒶalteration in the MS de Galis, and after him Sir Galahad. So you see there was simply nothing to be done, now, but play their right bower—bringⒶalteration in the MS out the superbest of the superb, the mightiest of the mighty, the great Sir Launcelot himself!

A proud moment for me? I should think so. Yonder was Arthur, king of BritainⒶemendation; yonder was Guenever; yes, and whole tribes of little provincial kings and kinglets; and in the tented camp yonder, renowned knights from many lands; and likewise the selectest body known to chivalry, the knights of the Table Round, the most illustrious in Christendom;Ⓐalteration in the MS and, biggest fact of all, the very sun of their shining system was yonder couching his lance, the focal point of forty thousand adoringⒶemendation eyes; and all by myself here was I layingⒶemendation for him. Across my mind flitted the dear image of a certain hello-girl of West Hartford, and I wishedⒶalteration in the MS she could see me now. In that moment, down came the Invincible, with the rush of a whirlwind—the courtly world rose to its feetⒶalteration in the MS and bent forward—the fateful coils went circling through the air, and before you could wink I was towing Sir Launcelot across the field on his back, and kissing my hand to the storm of waving kerchiefs and the thunder-crash of applause that greeted me!

Said I to myself, as I coiled my lariat and hung it on my saddle-horn, and sat there drunk with glory, “The victory is perfect—no other will venture against me—knight-errantryⒶemendation is dead.” Now imagine my astonishment—and everybody else’s, too—to hear the peculiar bugle call which announces that another competitor is about to enter the lists! There was a mystery here; I couldn’t account for this thing. Next, I noticed Merlin gliding away from me; and then I noticed that [begin page 436] my lasso was gone! The old sleight-of-hand expertⒶalteration in the MS had stolen it, sure, and slipped it under his robe.

The bugle blew again. I looked, and down came SagramourⒶrejected substantive riding again, with his dust brushed off and his veil nicely re-arranged. I trotted up to meet him, and pretended to find him by the sound of his horse’s hoofs. He said:

“Thou’rt quick of ear, but it will not save theeⒶalteration in the MS from this!” and he touched the hilt of his great sword. “An ye are not able to see it, because of the influence of the veil, know that it is no cumbrous lance, but a sword—and I ween ye will not be able to avoid it.”

His visor was up; there was death in his smile. I should never be able to dodge his sword, that was plain. Somebody was going to die, this time. If he got the drop on me, I could name the corpse. We rode forward together, and saluted the royalties. This time the king was disturbed. He said:

“Where is thy strange weapon?”

“It is stolen, sire.”

“Hast another at hand?”

“No, sire, I brought only the one.”

Then Merlin mixed in:

“He brought but the one because there was but the one to bring. There exists none other but that one. It belongeth to the KingⒶemendation of the Demons of the Sea.Ⓐalteration in the MS This man is a pretender and ignorant; else he had known that that weapon can be used in but eightⒶrejected substantive Ⓐtextual note bouts only, and then it vanisheth away to its home under the sea.”

“Then is he weaponless,” said the king. “Sir Sagramour, ye will grant him leave to borrow.”

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“And I will lend!”Ⓐalteration in the MS said Sir Launcelot, limping up. “He is as brave a knight of his hands as any that be on live, and he shall have mine.”

He put his hand on his sword to draw it, but Sir Sagramour said:

“Stay, it may not be. He shall fight with his own weapons; it was his privilege to choose them and bring them. If he has erred, on his head be it.”

“Knight!” said the king. “Thou’rt overwrought with passion; it disorders thy mind. Wouldst kill a naked man?”

“An he do it, he shall answer it to me,” said Sir Launcelot.

“I will answer it to any he that desireth!” retorted Sir Sagramour hotly.

Merlin broke in, rubbing his hands and smiling his low-downestⒶalteration in the MS smile of malicious gratification:

“ ’Tis well said, right well said! And ’tis enough of parleying, let my lord the king deliver the battle signal.”

The king had to yield. The bugle made proclamation, and we turned apart and rode to our stations. There we stood, a hundred yards apart, facing each other, rigid and motionless, like horsed statues. And so we remained, in a soundlessⒶalteration in the MS hush, as much as a full minute, everybody gazing, nobody stirring. It seemed as if the king could not take heart to give the signal. But at last he lifted his hand, the clear note of the bugle followed, Sir Sagramour’s long blade described a flashing curve in the air, and it was superb to see him come. I sat still. On he came. I did not move. People got so excited that they shouted to me:

“Fly,Ⓐemendation fly! Save thyself! This is murther!”

I never budged so much as an inch, till that thundering apparition had got within fifteen paces of me; then I snatched a dragoon revolver out of my holster, there was a flash and a roar, and the revolver was back in the holster before anybody could tell what had happened.

Here was a riderless horse plunging by, and yonder lay Sir Sagramour, stone dead.

The people that ran to himⒶrejected substantive Ⓐtextual note were stricken dumb to find that the life was actually gone out of the man, and no reason for itⒶalteration in the MS visible, no hurt upon his body, nothing like a wound. There was a hole through the breast ofⒶalteration in the MS his chain-mailⒶemendation, but theyⒶalteration in the MS attached no importance to a little thing like that; and as a bullet wound there produces but little blood, none came in sight because of the clothingⒶalteration in the MS and swaddlingsⒶemendation under the [begin page 438] armor. The body was dragged over to let the king and the swells look down upon it. They were stupefied with astonishment, naturally. I was requested to come and explain the miracle. But I remained in my tracks, like a statue, and said:

“If it is a command, I will come; but my lord the king knows that I am where the laws of combat require me to remain, while any desire to come against me.”

I waited. Nobody challenged. Then I said:

“If there are any who doubt that this field isⒶalteration in the MS well and fairly won, I do not wait for them to challenge me, I challenge them.”

“It is a gallant offer,” said the king, “and well beseems you. Whom will you name, first?”

“I name none, I challenge all! Here I stand, and dare the chivalry of England to come against me—not by individuals, but in massⒶemendation !”

“What!” shouted a score of knights.

“You have heard the challenge. Take it, or I proclaim you recreant knights and vanquished, every one!”

It was a “bluff,” you know. AtⒶalteration in the MS such a time it is sound judgment to put on a bold face and play your hand for a hundred times whatⒶrejected substantive it is worth; forty-nine times out of fiftyⒶalteration in the MS nobody dares to “call,”Ⓐalteration in the MS and you rake in the chips. But just this once—well,Ⓐalteration in the MS things looked squally! In just no time, five hundred knights were scrambling into their sad- [begin page 439] dles , and before you could wink a widely scattering drove were under way and clattering down upon me. I snatched both revolvers from the holsters and began to measure distances and calculate chances.

Bang! one saddle empty. Bang! another one. Bang-bang! and I bagged two. Well, it was nip and tuck with us, and I knew it. If I spentⒶalteration in the MS the eleventh shot without convincing these people, the twelfth man would kill me, sure.

And soⒶalteration in the MS I never did feel so happy as I did when my ninthⒶemendation downed its man and I detected the wavering in the crowd which is premonitory of panic. An instant lost, now, couldⒶalteration in the MS knock out my last chance. But I didn’t lose it. I raised both revolvers and pointed them—the halted host stood their ground just about one good square moment, then broke and fled.

The day was mine. Knight-errantry was a doomed institution. The marchⒶalteration in the MS of civilization was begun. How did I feel? Ah,Ⓐalteration in the MS you never could imagine it.

And Brer Merlin? His stock was flat again. Somehow, every time the magic of fol-de-rol tried conclusions with the magic of science, the magic of fol-de-rol got left.