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A CONNECTICUT
YANKEE IN KING
ARTHUR’S COURT

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      Preface
      A Word of Explanation
1.      Camelot
2.      King Arthur’s Court
3.      Knights of the Table Round
4.      Sir Dinadan the Humorist
5.      An Inspiration
6.      The Eclipse
7.      Merlin’s Tower
8.      The Boss
9.      The Tournament
10.      Beginnings of Civilization
11.      The Yankee in Search of Adventures
12.      Slow Torture
13.      Freemen!
14.      “Defend Thee, Lord!”
15.      Sandy’s Tale
16.      Morgan le Fay
17.      A Royal Banquet
18.      In the Queen’s Dungeons
19.      Knight-Errantry as a Trade
20.      The Ogre’s Castle
21.      The Pilgrims
22.      The Holy Fountain
23.      Restoration of the Fountain
24.      A Rival Magician
25.      A Competitive Examination
26.      The First Newspaper
27.      The Yankee and the King Travel Incognito
28.      Drilling the King
29.      The Small-Pox Hut
30.      The Tragedy of the Manor House
31.      Marco
32.      Dowley’s Humiliation
33.      Sixth-Century Political Economy
34.      The Yankee and the King Sold as Slaves
35.      A Pitiful Incident
36.      An Encounter in the Dark
37.      An Awful Predicament
38.      Sir Launcelot and Knights to the Rescue
39.      The Yankee’s Fight with the Knights
40.      Three Years Later
41.      The Interdict
42.      War!
43.      The Battle of the Sand-Belt
44.      A Postscript by Clarence

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      “I saw he meant business.” (Frontispiece)
      Initial Letter (A Word of Explanation)
      The Stranger’s Story
      Tailpiece
      The Tale of the Lost Land
      Initial Letter (Chapter 1)
      “The head of the cavalcade swept forward.”
      The Round Table
      Initial Letter (Chapter 2)
      “That will do,” I said; “I reckon you are a patient.”
      “Go ’long,” I said, “you ain’t more than a paragraph.”
      Merlin
      Initial Letter (Chapter 3)
      “The flies buzzed and bit, unmolested.”
      “Sir Arthur took it up by the handles.”
      “This horrible sky-towering monster.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 4)
      The Practical Joker’s Joke
      “Queen Guenever was as naively interested as the rest.”
      The King
      Initial Letter (Chapter 5)
      “Oh, beware! these are awful words!”
      “He was frighted, even to the marrow.”
      Sir Boss
      Initial Letter (Chapter 6)
      “It was a noble effect.”
      “Smothered with blessings.”
      One of the People
      Initial Letter (Chapter 7)
      “There was no soap, no matches, no looking-glass.”
      “The reverent and awe-stricken multitudes.”
      “That old tower leaped into the sky in chunks.”
      “That was the Church.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 8)
      “Why they were nothing but rabbits.”
      “Inherited ideas are a curious thing.”
      The Earth Belongs to the People
      All Men Are Born Free and Equal
      Sir Sagramour le Desirous
      Initial Letter (Chapter 9)
      “Sing, dance, carouse every night.”
      “Detailed an intelligent priest, and ordered him to report it.”
      Some of the Boys Going a Grailing
      “For I was afraid of the Church.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 10)
      “The nineteenth century booming under its very nose.”
      A West Pointer
      A Middy from My Naval Academy
      Sandy
      “The boys helped me, or I never could have got in.” (Chapter 11)
      The Three Brothers, as Described by Sandy
      “Great Scott, can’t you understand a little thing like that?”
      “And so we started.”
      Ye Iron Dude
      Initial Letter (Chapter 12)
      The Journey
      Effect of the Sun on the Iron Clothes
      “She continued to fetch and pour until I was well soaked.”
      Audi Alteram
      Initial Letter (Chapter 13)
      “By a sarcasm of law and phrase, they were freemen.”
      “To subtract the Nation and leave behind some dregs.”
      Burial of a Freeman
      “Two of a Kind”
      “They thought I was one of those fire-belching dragons.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 14)
      Effect of the Pipe on the Freemen
      Effect of the Pipe on Sandy
      “Defend thee, lord!—peril of life is toward!”
      “They came in a body, they came with a whirr.”
      The Three Maids
      Initial Letter (Chapter 15)
      Sir Gawaine and Sir Uwaine
      “Look out and hold on tight.”
      Marhaus, Son of the King of Ireland, from an Effigy Found in the Castle
      “It was the largest castle we had seen.”
      Mrs. le Fay
      Initial Letter (Chapter 16)
      “This would undermine the Church.”
      Sir Cote Male Taile
      “We were challenged by the warders, and after a parley admitted.”
      King Uriens
      Initial Letter (Chapter 17)
      “After prayers we had dinner.”
      “Original agony.”
      “I caught a picture that will not go from me.”
      “They have a right to their view. I only stand to this.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 18)
      The Church, the King, the Nobleman, and the Freeman
      “The Queen’s Own”
      “Children of Monarchy by the Grace of God and the Established Church.”
      “How old are you, Sandy?”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 19)
      “Then Sir Marhaus ran to the duke, and smote him with his spear.”
      “The troublesomest old sow of the lot.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 20)
      Sandy with Royalty
      “We got the hogs home.”
      Supreme Head of the Church and Some Other Heads
      Initial Letter (Chapter 21)
      Sandy and The Boss at the Second Table
      “It had in it a sample of about all the upper occupations and professions.”
      A Band of Slaves
      A Foundling
      Initial Letter (Chapter 22)
      “There are ways to persuade him to abandon it.”
      “At the twelfth repetition they fell apart in chunks.”
      “He unlimbered his tongue and cursed like a bishop.”
      The Spirit of the Church
      Initial Letter (Chapter 23)
      “The Abbot’s solemn procession.”
      “That fellow on the pillar standing rigid.”
      “Bgwjjilligkkk!”
      “What is it you call it?—chuckleheads.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 24)
      “Sandy was worn out with nursing.”
      Overbalanced
      The False Prophet Going to Meet the King
      “A child’s affair for simpleness.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 25)
      “Next!”
      “Not a solitary word of it all could these catfish make head or tail of.”
      Decorations of Sixth-Century Aristocracy
      “Latest irruption—only two cents.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 26)
      “Where Launcelot is, she noteth not the going forth of the king.”
      “Hast seen Sir Launcelot about?”
      “It was delicious to see a newspaper again.”
      Solid Comfort
      Barber to H. M. the King
      Initial Letter (Chapter 27)
      “Why do you not warn me to cease?”
      Another Miracle
      The Spirit That Goeth with Burdens That Have Not Honor
      Initial Letter (Chapter 28)
      “Varlet, serve to me what cheer ye have.”
      “Brother!—to dirt like that?”
      “Armor is heavy, yet is it a proud burden, and a man standeth straight in it.”
      “He was great, now.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 29)
      Some Manhood Even in a King
      Under the Curse of Rome
      The Tree and the Fruit
      Initial Letter (Chapter 30)
      The Fire
      Pursuit
      “A tree is known by its fruits.”
      “To the gentleman he was abject.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 31)
      “Toward the monk the coal burner was deeply reverent.”
      “When a slave passed he couldn’t even see him.”
      “Presently we struck an incident.”
      “Walking on air, she was so proud.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 32)
      “And were soon as sociable as old acquaintances.”
      The Feast
      ’Rah for Protection!
      Initial Letter (Chapter 33)
      “Starving eh? why don’t you grow a nose like mine?”
      Evolution
      Discrepancy in Noses Makes No Difference
      Hoist by His Own Canard
      My Lord, the Earl Grip
      Initial Letter (Chapter 34)
      “He was hungry for a fight.”
      “Yes, sire, that is about it, I am afraid.”
      The Orator
      “We constituted the rear of his procession.”
      “He was a man.”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 35)
      On the Tramp
      Slaves Warming Themselves
      “A sample of one sort of London society.”
      The Slave-Driver
      Initial Letter (Chapter 36)
      “Merely a great big village.”
      Sandy Rode by on a Mule
      The Newsboy
      Sister Your Blind Is Disarranged
      Initial Letter (Chapter 37)
      “It lay there all battered to pulp.”
      Streets of London
      “He gave me a sudden look that bit right into my marrow.”
      “Launcelot swept in.”
      Sir Galahad Takes a Header
      Knights Practicing on the Quiet
      “Who fails shall sup in Hell to-night!”
      Slim Jim
      Initial Letter (Chapter 39)
      “Go it, Slim Jim!”
      “Great Scott, but there was a sensation!”
      Brer Merlin Steals the Lariat
      Charge of the Five Hundred Knights
      “A yard of snowy church-warden”
      Initial Letter (Chapter 40)
      Three Years Later
      “So we took a man of war.”
      Catcher of the Ulster Nine
      Snuffing the Candle
      Initial Letter (Chapter 41)
      “Hello-Central!”
      “Where was my great commerce?”
      Sir Mordred
      Initial Letter (Chapter 42)
      Deciding an Argument
      “The rest of the tale is just war, pure and simple.”
      “Traitor, now is thy death day come.”
      “The Church is master, now.”
      One of the Fifty-two
      Initial Letter (Chapter 43)
      “I could imagine the baby goo-gooing.”
      “The sun struck the sea of armor and set it all aflash.”
      High Church
      After the Explosion
      The Church Puts Its Foot in It
      Transformation
      Initial Letter (Chapter 44)
      Tailpiece
      “Delirium, of course, but so real!”
      “Hands off! my person is sacred.”
      The End