I had shut the door to. Then I turned around, and there he was. I used to be scared of him all the time, he tanned me so much. I reckoned I was scared now, too; but in a minute I see I was mistaken. That is, after the first jolt, as you may say, when my breath sortⒶalteration in the MS of hitched—he being so unexpected; but right away after, I see I warn’t scared of him worth bothering about.
He was most fifty, and he looked it. His hair was long and tangled and greasy, and hung down, and you could see his eyes shining through,Ⓐhistorical collation likeⒶalteration in the MS Ⓐemendation he was behind vines. It was all black;Ⓐhistorical collation no gray; so was his long, mixed-up whiskers. There warn’t no color in his face whereⒶhistorical collation his face showed; it was white; not like another man’s white, but a white to make a bodyⒶemendation sick, a white to make a body’sⒶemendation flesh crawl—a tree-toad white, a fish-belly white. As for his clothes—just rags, that was all. HeⒶalteration in the MS had one ancleⒶhistorical collation resting on t’otherⒶemendation knee; the boot on that foot was busted, and two of his toes stuck through, and he worked them,Ⓐhistorical collation now and then. His hat was laying on the floor; an old black slouch with the top caved in, like a lid.
I stood,Ⓐhistorical collation a-looking at him; he set there a-looking at me, with his chair tilted back a little. I set the candle down. I noticed the window was up; soⒶalteration in the MS he had clumb in by the shed. He kept a-looking me all over. By and byⒶhistorical collation he says:
“Starchy clothes—very. You think you’re a good deal of a big-bug, don’t Ⓐemendation you?”
[begin page 24] “Maybe I am, maybe I ain’t,” I says.
“Don’t you give me noneⒶalteration in the MS Ⓐemendation o’Ⓐemendation your lip,” says he. “You’ve put on considerbleⒶemendation many frills since I beenⒶemendation away. I’ll take you down a peg before I gitⒶtextual note Ⓐhistorical collation doneⒶalteration in the MS with you. You’re educated, too, they say; can read and write. You think you’re better’n your father, now, don’t you, because he can’tⒺexplanatory note? I’ll take it out of you. Who told you you might meddle with such hifalut’nⒶalteration in the MS Ⓐemendation foolishness, hey?—who told you you could?”
“The widow. She told me.”
“The widow, hey?—andⒶemendation who told the widow she could put in her shovel about a thing that ain’t none of her business?”
“Nobody never told her.”
“WellⒶhistorical collation I’ll learn her how to meddle. And looky-hereⒶhistorical collation—you drop that school, youⒶemendation hear? I’ll learn people to bring up a boyⒶalteration in the MS to put on airs over his own father and let on to be better’nⒶemendation what he Ⓐemendation is. You lemmeⒶalteration in the MS catch you fooling around that school again, you hear?Ⓐalteration in the MS Your mother couldn’t read, and she couldn’t write, nuther, before she died. None of the family couldn’t, before they died. I can’t; and here you’reⒶemendation a-swelling yourself up like this. I ain’t the man to stand it—you hear? Say—lemme hear you read.”
I took up a book and begun something about General Washington and the warsⒺexplanatory note. When I’d read about a half a minute, he fetched the book a whack with his hand and knocked it across the house. He says:
“It’s so. You can do it. I had my doubts when youⒶemendation told me. Now looky-hereⒶhistorical collation; you stop that putting on frills. I won’t have it. I’ll lay for you, my smarty; and if I catch you about that school I’ll tan you good. First you know you’ll get religion, too. IⒶalteration in the MS never seeⒶemendation such a son.”
He took up a little blue and yaller picture of some cowsⒶalteration in the MS and a boy, and says—Ⓐhistorical collation
“What’s this?”
“It’s something they give me for learning my lessons good.”
He tore it up, and says—
“I’ll give you something better—I’ll give you a cowhideⒶemendation.”
He set there a-mumbling and a-growling a minute, and then he says—
“Ain’t you a sweet-scentedⒶalteration in the MS dandy,Ⓐemendation though?Ⓐalteration in the MS A bed; and bedclothes; and a look’n-glassⒶemendation; and a piece of carpet on the floor—and [begin page 25] your own father got to sleep with the hogs in the tanyard. I never see such a son.Ⓐalteration in the MS I bet I’ll take some o’ theseⒶemendation frills out o’ youⒶemendation before I’mⒶalteration in the MS done with you. Why there ain’t no end to your airs—they say you’re rich. Hey?—how’s that?”
“They lie—that’s how.”
“Looky-hereⒶhistorical collation—mind how you talk to me; I’m a-standing about all I can stand, now—so don’t gimme no sass. I’ve beenⒶemendation in town two days, and I hain’tⒶalteration in the MS heard nothing but about you bein’Ⓐemendation rich. I heard about it away down the river, too. That’s why I come. You git me that money to-morrow—I want it.”
“I hain’tⒶemendation got noⒶalteration in the MS Ⓐemendation money.”
“It’s a lie. Judge Thatcher’s got it. You git it. I want it.”
“I hain’tⒶemendation got noⒶalteration in the MS Ⓐemendation money, I tell you. You ask Judge Thatcher; he’ll tell you the sameⒶemendation.”
“All right. I’ll ask him; and I’ll make him pungle, too, or I’ll know the reason why. Say—how much you got in your pocket? I want it.”
“I hain’tⒶhistorical collation got only a dollar, and I want that to—Ⓐhistorical collation”
“It don’t make no difference what you want it for—you just shell it out.”
He took it and bit it,Ⓐhistorical collation toⒶalteration in the MS see if it was good, and then he said he was [begin page 26] going down town toⒶemendation get some whisky; said he hadn’t had a drink all day. When he had got out on the shed, he put his head in again, and cussed me for putting on frills and trying to beⒶalteration in the MS better than him; and when I reckoned he was goneⒶhistorical collation he come back and put his head in again, and told me to mind about that school, because he was going to lay for me and lick me if I didn’t drop that.
Next day he was drunk, and he went to Judge Thatcher’s and bullyragged him and tried to make him give up the money, but he couldn’t, and then he swore he’d make the law force him.
The judge and the widow went to law to get the court to take me away from him and let one of them be my guardian; but it was a new judge that had just come, and he didn’t know the old man; so he said courts mustn’t interfere and separate familiesⒶalteration in the MS if they could help it; said he’d druther not take a child away from its father. SoⒶalteration in the MS JudgeⒶalteration in the MS Thatcher and the widow had to quitⒶalteration in the MS on the business.
That pleased the old man till he couldn’t rest. He said he’d cowhideⒶalteration in the MS Ⓐemendation me till I was black and blue if I didn’t raise some money for him. I borrowed three dollars from Judge ThatcherⒶhistorical collation and papⒶemendation Ⓐalteration in the MS took it and got drunk and went a-blowingⒶemendation around and cussing and whooping and carrying on; and he kept it up all over town, with a tin panⒶhistorical collation till most midnightⒶemendation; then they jailed him, and next day they had him before courtⒶhistorical collation and jailed him again for a week. But he said he was satisfied; said he was boss of his sonⒶalteration in the MS Ⓐhistorical collation and he’d make it warm for him.
When he got out the newⒶemendation judge said he was agoingⒶemendation to make a man of himⒺexplanatory note. SoⒶalteration in the MS he took him to his own house, and dressed him up clean and nice, and had him to breakfast and dinner and supper with the family, and wasⒶalteration in the MS just old pie to him, so to speak. And after supper he talked to him about temperance and such things till the old man cried, and said he’d been a fool, and fooled away his life; but now he was agoingⒶemendation to turn over a new leafⒶalteration in the MS and be a man nobody wouldn’t be ashamed of, and he hoped the judge would help him and not look down on him. The judge said he could hug him for them words; so he cried, and his wife she cried, and the old manⒶhistorical collation cried again; saidⒶhistorical collation he’dⒶtextual note been a man that had always been misunderstood,Ⓐhistorical collation before, and the judge said he believed it. The old man said that what a man wanted thatⒶalteration in the MS was down, was sympathy; and the judge said it was so; [begin page 27] so they cried again. And when it was bedtime, the old man roseⒶemendation up and held out his handⒶhistorical collation and says:
“Look at it,Ⓐhistorical collation gentlemenⒶhistorical collation and ladies all; take a-holdⒶemendation of it; shake it. There’s a hand that was the hand of a hog; but it ain’t so no more; it’s the hand of a man that’s started in on a new lifeⒶhistorical collation and ’ll die before he’ll go back. YouⒶemendation mark them words—don’t forget I said them. It’s a clean hand,Ⓐhistorical collation now; shakeⒶemendation it—don’t be afeard.”
So they shook it, one after the other, all around, and cried. The judge’s wifeⒶemendation she kissed it. Then the old man he signed a pledge—Ⓐalteration in the MSmade his markⒶemendation. The judge said it was the holiest time on record, or something like that. Then they tucked the old man into a beautiful roomⒶalteration in the MS, which was the spare room, and in the night some timeⒶhistorical collation he got powerful thirsty and clumb out onto the porch-roof and slid down a stanchion and traded his new coat for a jug of forty-rod, and clumb back again and had a good oldⒶemendation time; and towards daylight he crawled out again, drunk as a fiddler, and rolled off the porch and broke his left arm in two places and was most froze to death when somebody found him after sun-upⒶalteration in the MS. And when they come to look at that spare room, they had to take soundings before they could navigate it.
[begin page 28] The judge he felt kind of sore. He said he reckoned a body could reform the oldⒶtextual note Ⓐhistorical collation man with a shot-gun, maybe, but he didn’t know no other way.
old] Huck’s invariant “old” appears 212 times in the manuscript. In this place only, it appears as “ole” in the first edition, but is otherwise invariant “old” there as well. The first edition reading is therefore unlikely to be an authorial change, and more likely to be a [begin page 815] transcription error, possibly introduced by the typist, who could easily have misread Mark Twain’s widely looped d as an e.
new judge said he was agoing to make a man of him] In 1867, having visited Hannibal for the first time since 1861, Mark Twain recalled an incident from his youth when
Jimmy Finn, the town drunkard, reformed, and that broke up the only saloon in the village. But the temperance people liked it; they were willing enough to sacrifice public prosperity to public morality. And so they made much of Jimmy Finn—dressed him up in new clothes, and had him out to breakfast and to dinner, and so forth, and showed him off as a great living curiosity—a shining example of the power of temperance doctrines when earnestly and eloquently set forth. Which was all very well, you know, and sounded well, and looked well in print, but Jimmy Finn couldn’t stand it. He got remorseful about the loss of his liberty; and then he got melancholy from thinking about it so much; and after that, he got drunk. He got awfully drunk in the chief citizen’s house, and the next morning that house was as if the swine had tarried in it. That outraged the temperance [begin page 391] people and delighted the opposite faction. The former rallied and reformed Jim once more, but in an evil hour temptation came upon him, and he sold his body to a doctor for a quart of whiskey, and that ended all his earthly troubles. He drank it all at one sitting, and his soul went to its long account and his body went to Dr. Orville Grant. (SLC 1867)
In 1877 Mark Twain attributed an effort to “reform” the town drunkard to the character based on his brother Orion in “Autobiography of a Damned Fool” ( S&B , 152–55). In 1906, he asserted that his father had tried, and failed, to reform both Finn and Injun Joe (AD, 8 Mar 1906, CU-MARK, in MTA , 2:175).