Explanatory Notes
Apparatus Notes
MTPDocEd
[begin page 50]
The Second Advent

(1881)


On the title page of the manuscript, A. B. Paine called this a “semi burlesque of a new Christ, born in Arkansas” and added, “Hardly usable.” Probably it was again Paine who wrote at some time, “Impossible of use”—a note that was later erased. The objectionable feature was the satire leveled at conventional pieties, including belief in the Virgin Birth and in special providences. Clemens had no doubt of the absurdity of both, and he did not change his view. It was about 1905 that he wrote, “It would be difficult to construct a dog that could swallow the moon, it would be impossible to construct a virgin that could give birth to a child, but it is no trick at all to construct an ass who could swallow the whole combined menagerie and then not see the humor of criticising some other ass for being an ass.”1 It should be noted that although Clemens scoffed at the idea of a virgin birth he was a fervent defender of womanly virtue: in 1907 he spoke of seeing in the morning paper the phrase “age of consent,” “that phrase which—considering its awful meaning—I think is the blackest one that exists in any language. It always unseats my self-possession.”2 He went on to contend that just as there is no age of consent to murder there should be none for a woman's seduction. He was capable of placing the Almighty in the role of seducer—thereby further ridiculing the concept of the Virgin Birth: “We [begin page 51] don't know that Joseph didn't beget the Savior; but we do know that . . . it was much too large a contract for him. There was One, and only One, at the time, that was competent and in all ways qualified for the vast production; . . . the plausibilities favor the idea that He is the one fairly and justifiably under suspicion.”3

The principle underlying Clemens' contempt for the notion of special providences was revealed in a notebook entry of 1886:

Special Providence! That phrase nauseates me—with its implied importance of mankind & triviality of God. In my opinion these myriads of globes are merely the blood-corpuscles ebbing & flowing through the arteries of God, & we but animalculae that infest them, disease them, pollute them: & God does not know we are there, & would not care if He did.4

This perspective on the human situation was more than just a momentary conceit, for it recurs often in his writings.5 On the basis of such a view, Clemens satirized man's self-important belief that the universe would make special exceptions for him.

In writing of “holy Talmage” in “The Second Advent,” Mark Twain had in mind the Rev. T. DeWitt Talmage, a prominent clergyman and popular orator. Talmage had been a target of Mark Twain's satire in the 1870s after he had complained that the odor of the unwashed workingman was offensive to the more cultivated classes in a church congregation. Mark Twain speculated that if Talmage “had been chosen among the original Twelve Apostles he would not have associated with the rest, because he could not have stood the fishy smell of some of his comrades who came from around the Sea of Galilee.”6

Mark Twain may have intended to develop “The Second Advent” into a novel, but it appears that he did not have enough matter and plot. His borrowing of much of another manuscript, “The Holy Children,” for use as the latter part of “The Second Advent” suggests that he had already begun to improvise. Some of his later plans for continuing the story, none of which he carried out, are discussed in the Introduction.

The last line of “The Second Advent” indicates that the story was written in 1881, and the paper used for the pages written specifically for “The Second Advent” is not known to have been used before that date. However, [begin page 52] Paine noted on the title page, “Probably in 1871.” He may have had other information on the date of the piece, or he may simply not have noticed the last line. But 1881 seems the more probable date for this piece.

“The Second Advent” in some ways parallels “The Man that Corrupted Hadleyburg”: the events of each story prompt a reversal of religious values, and the outcomes of both are formal resolutions inverting the previous moral stances of the villagers. The citizens of Hadleyburg, after learning that untried virtue is worthless, revise their town's motto to read, “Lead Us into Temptation”; the people of Black Jack, finding that to pray for special providences is disastrous, resolve that the only allowable prayer shall be “Lord, Thy will, not mine, be done.

Editorial Notes
1 

“Comments on ‘Asia and Europe’ ”, DV 127.

2 

“Imaginary Interview with the President,” DV 250. Clemens headed the typescript, “Dictated April 20, 1907.”

3 

Clemens to Mr. Beck, 25 April 1909.

4 

Notebook 21, TS p. 14.

5 

See, for example, Following the Equator, DE 20:114, and WWD , p. 454.

6 

“About Smells” in What Is Man? and Other Philosophical Writings, ed. Paul Baender (Berkeley, Los Angeles, London: University of California Press, 1972).

Textual Commentary

Copy-text for “The Second Advent” is the manuscript of eighty-four pages, twenty-two of which were originally part of “The Holy Children.” Although Mark Twain revised as he went along while writing “The Second Advent,” and the presence of alterations in pencil (p. 54.2) and in black ink (p. 58.3 and the canceled passage at 59.17) shows that he also checked his manuscript at other times, he apparently did not return to revise the work as a whole once he had completed it. Therefore, the story is essentially a first draft.

In addition to the pages adapted from the earlier tale, one other section, the description of the selection and packing of the jury (pp. 59.17–60.22), was written out of sequence. An examination of the inks used and of the watermarks and ragged edges of the torn half-sheets which make up the manuscript shows that this passage was written after Mark Twain had reached “and were not satisfied” (p. 61.4–5) and that the split between the clergymen and the editors was an afterthought. The same kind of evidence indicates that the title page of the manuscript, which matches the last page written for “The Second Advent,” was supplied after the story was finished. A separate half-sheet of manuscript in the Mark Twain Papers, unnumbered and inscribed only “There was great stir and talk and wonder in Black Jack,” was originally the first page of the story. It was probably a false start, discarded but not destroyed.

Of all the pronouns referring to God or Christ in “The Second Advent,” Mark Twain capitalized only one (“He,” p. 56.12). Although he often wrote these pronouns without capitals, ordinarily he expected his editors to provide conventional capitalization. In this text six pronouns referring to God have been so emended, since the tale would gain nothing from inconsistent capitalization or from an anomalous lack of capitals. However, pronouns referring to Christ and the new Savior have been left lower case, since Mark Twain makes the identity of the two, and the divinity of the latter, satirically ambiguous.

Following Mark Twain's revisions, a special collation records the changes he made in light blue ink to the penciled “Holy Children” manuscript when incorporating its pages into “The Second Advent.” This list is cued to both pieces by page and line number (“The Holy Children” page and line numbers are in square brackets) and is arranged to show each change made for “The Second Advent” together with the reading in “The Holy Children” which it replaces.

Revisions made during the inscription of “The Holy Children” manuscript and incorporated in the text of both works are listed in the table of Mark Twain's revisions for “The Holy Children” where page and line numbers for both pieces are given.

Special Collation
The Second Advent The Holy Children
53.1–63.4 70.1–72.8–9 Black Jack . . . morning. These . . . triumph.
63.8 72.12 the saint that pale slim child
63.10 72.14 he Also at 63.24 (twice) and 63.25 she Also at 72.28 (twice) and 72.30
63.10 72.14 his Also at 63.10, 63.11, 63.23, and 63.25 her Also at 72.15 (twice), 72.28, and 72.30
63.13 72.17–18 thing . . . described. matter . . . describe.
63.21 72.26 disciple's child's
63.22 72.27 him Also at 63.23 her Also at 72.28
63.23 72.28 disciple child
63.27–28 72.31–36 utterly. ¶ There was utterly. ¶ It was . . . said. There was
63.34–35 73.7 holy disciple Holy Children
63.36 73.8–9 evidence was evidences were . . . and
64.1–7 73.10–13 But on . . . desired him The calls . . . were asked
64.9 73.14 He consented; and although See emendations. Although
64.11–22 73.17–18 complete; in . . . consequence, he complete. . . . The children
64.23 73.18–19 day. These changes day, . . . persons, and these changes
64.31 73.27 life lives
64.31 73.27 holy disciple See emendations. Holy Children.
64.32 73.28 saint was children were
64.36–65.1 73.33 until now, when such until such
65.5 74.1 holy Talmage was See emendations. Holy Children were
65.6 74.2 He Also at 65.10 They Also at 74.6
65.8–9 74.5 nurses of . . . about rose nurses rose
65.10 74.5–6 saint was Holy Children were
65.13 74.8–9 saint Holy Children
65.13 74.9 his their
65.20–26 74.16 death. ¶ By this . . . A rich bachelor death. A bachelor
65.29 74.19–20 to Black Jack . . . Savior to our village . . . children
65.30 74.20 health. So . . . but health. He
66.3 74.29 latter. Naturally . . . property. latter. To return to my narrative.
66.12–13 75.2–3 previously giving . . . disturber. previously warning . . . them.
66.14 75.4 Twelve Disciples children
66.16–17 75.6 the several communities . . . labored the community
66.20 75.9 next. So the See emendations. next. The
66.20 75.10 Twelve wasted gradually children began to waste
66.22 75.12 State village
66.24 75.14 a hundred five hundred
66.35 75.25 disciples Also at 67.9, 67.16, 67.27, and 67.33 children Also at 75.34, 76.5, 76.15, and 76.21
67.4 75.29 disciples' children's
67.6–8 75.31–32 Yet at times . . . Savior. Yet even . . . inconveniences.
67.8 75.33 man bachelor
67.12 75.36–76.1 holy Twelve Holy Children
67.20 76.9 region village
67.24 76.13 disciples Holy Children
67.24–25 76.13 moment, (for . . . him,) but moment, but
68.16 77.4 any person in Arkansas this village
68.18 77.6 one man
68.20 77.8 Arkansas this village
68.23 77.11 holy disciples See emendations. Holy Children
68.26 77.14 Twelve children
68.31–32 77.20 Savior and the disciples children
68.34–36 77.22 crucified. . . . 1881. shot.
[begin page 53]
The Second Advent

Black Jack is a very small village lying far away back in the western wilds and solitudes of Arkansas. It is made up of a few log cabins; its lanes are deep with mud in wet weather; its fences and gates are ricketyalteration in the MS and decayed; its cornfields and gardens are weedy, slovenly, and poorly cared for; there are no newspapers, no railways, no factories, no library; ignorance, sloth and drowsiness prevail. There is a small log church, but no school. The hogs are many, and they wallow by the doors, they sun themselves in the public places.

It is a frontier village; the border of the Indian Territory is not a day's walk away, and the loafing savage is a common sight in the town. There are some other sleepy villages thereabouts: Tumblinsonville, three or four miles off; Brunner, four or five; Sugarloaf, ten or twelve. In effect, the region is a solitude, and far removed from the busy world and the interests which animate it.

A gentle and comely young girl, Nancy Hopkins, lived in Black Jack, with her parents. The Hopkinses were old residents; in fact neither they nor their forerunnersemendation for two generations had ever known any other place than Black Jack. When Nancyalteration in the MS was just budding into womanhood, she was courted by several of the young men of the village, but she finally gave the preference to Jackson Barnes the blacksmith, and was promised to him in marriage by her parents. This was [begin page 54] soon known to everybody, and of course discussed freely, in village fashion. The young couple were chaffed, joked, andalteration in the MS congratulated in the frank, rude, frontier way, and the discarded suitors were subjected to abundanceemendation of fat-witted raillery.

Then came a season of quiet, the subject being exhausted; a season wherein tongues were still, there being nothing whatever in that small world to talk about. But by and by a change came; suddenly all tongues were busy again. Busier, too, than they had ever been at any time before, within any one's memory; for never before had they been furnished with anything like so prodigious a topic as now offered itself: Nancy Hopkins, the sweet young bride elect, was—

The news flew from lip to lip with almost telegraphic swiftness; wives told it to their husbands; husbands to bachelors; servants got hold of it and told it to the young misses; it was gossiped over in every corner; rude gross pioneers coarsely joked about it over their whisky in the village grocery, accompanying their witticisms with profane and obscene words and mighty explosions of horse laughter. The unsuspecting blacksmith was called into this grocery and the crushing news sprung upon him with a brutal frankness and directness. At first he was bowed with grief and misery; but very soon anger took the place of these feelings, and he went forth saying he would go and break the engagement. After he was gone, the grocery crowd organized itself into a public meeting to consider what ought to be done with the girl. After brief debate it was resolved—

1.      That she must name her betrayer.
2.      And immediately marry him.
3.      Or be tarred and feathered and banished to the Indian Territory.

The proceedings were hardly ended when Jackson Barnes was seen returning; and, to the general astonishment, his face was seen to be calm, placid, content—even joyful. Everybody crowded around to hear what he might say in explanation of this strange result. There was a deep and waiting silence for some moments; then Barnes said solemnly, and with awe in his voice and manner:

“She has explained it. She has made everything clear. I am satisfied, and have taken her back to my love and protection. She has told me all, and with perfect frankness, concealing nothing. She is pure and undefiled. She will give birth to a son, but no man has had to do with her. [begin page 55] God has honored her, God has overshadowed her, and to Himemendation she will bear this child. A joy inexpressible is ours, for we are blessed beyond all mankind.”

His face was radiant with a holy happiness while he spoke. Yet when he had finished a brutal jeer went up from the crowd, and everybody mocked at him, and he was assailed on all sides with insulting remarks and questions. One said—

“How does she know it was God?”

Barnes answeredalteration in the MS: “An angel told her.”

“When did the angel tell her?”

“Several months ago.”

“Before, or after the actalteration in the MS?”

“Before.”

“Told her it was going to happen?”

“Yes.”

“Did she believe the angel at the time?”

“Yes.”

“But didn't mention the matter to you at the time?”

“No.”

“Why didn't she?”

“I do not know.”

“Did she mention it to the old people?”

“No.”

“Why didn't she?”

“I do not know.”

“Had she any other evidence as to the factsalteration in the MS than the angel?”

“No.”

“What did the angel look like?”

“Like a man.”

“Naked?”

“No—clothed.”

“How?”

“In ancient times the angels came clothed in a robe, the dress of the people of the day. Naturally this one was clothed according to the fashion of our day. He wore a straw hat, a blue jeans roundabout and pants, and cowhide boots.”

“How did she know he was an angel?”

[begin page 56]

“Because he said he was; and angels cannot lie.”

“Did he speak English?”

“Of course; else she would not have understood him.”

“Did he speak likealteration in the MS an American, or with an accent?emendation

“He had no accent.”

“Were there any witnesses?”

“No—she was alone.”

“It might have been well to have some witnesses. Have you any evidence to convince you except her word?”

“Yes. While I talked with her, sleep came upon me for a moment, and I dreamed. In my dream I was assuredalteration in the MS by God that all she had said was true, and He also commanded me to stand by her and marry her.”

“How do you know that the dream came from God and not from your dinner? How could you tell?”

“I knew because the voice of the dream distinctly said so.”

“You believe, then, that Nancy Hopkins is still pure and undefiled?”

“I know it. She is still a virgin.”

“Of course you may know that, and know it beyond doubt or question, if you have applied the right test. Have you done this?”

“I have not applied any test. I do not need to. I know perfectly that she is a virgin, by better evidence than a test.”

“By what evidence? How can you know—how do you know—that she is still a virgin?”

“I know it because she told me so herself, with her own lips.”

“Yes, and you dreamed it besides.”

“I did.”

“Absolutely overwhelming proof—isn't it?”

“It seems so to me.”

“Isn't it possible that a girl might lie, in such circumstances, to save her good name?”

“To save her good name, yes; but to lie in this case would be to rob herself of the unspeakable honor of being made fruitful by Almighty God. It would be more than human heroism for Nancyalteration in the MS Hopkins to lie, in this case, and deny the illustrious fatherhood of her child, and throw away the opportunity to make her name revered and renowned forever in the world.alteration in the MS She did right to confess her relations with the Deity. [begin page 57] Where is there a girl in Black Jack who would not be glad to enjoy a like experience, and proud to proclaim it?”alteration in the MS

“You suspect none but God?”

“How should I?”

“You do not suspect the angel in the straw hat?”

“He merely brought the message, that is all.”

“And delivered it and left immediately?”

“I suppose so. I do not know.”

“Suppose he had staid away and sent it by mail—or per dream, which is cheaperalteration in the MS and saves paper and postage—would the result to Nancy have been the same, do you think?”

“Of course; for the angel had nothing to do but convey the prophecy; his functions ceased there.”

“Possibly they did. Still, it would be helpful to hear from the angel.alteration in the MS What shall you do with this child when it comes?”

“I shall rear it carefully, and provide for it to the best of my means.”

“And call it your own?”

“I would not dare to. It is the child of the most high God. It is holyalteration in the MS.”

“What shall you call it, if it be a girl?”

“It will not be a girl.”

“Then if it be a boy?”

“It shall be called Jesus Christ.”

“What—is there to be another Jesus Christ?”

“No, it is the same that was born of Mary, ages ago, not another. This is merely the Second Advent; I was so informed by the Most High in my dream.”

“You are in error, manifestly. He is to come the second time not humbly, but in clouds and great glory.”

“Yes, but that has all been changed. It was a question if the world would believe it was Jesus if he came in that way, so the former method was reinstitutedalteration in the MS. He is to be again born of an obscure Virgin, because the world cannot help but believe and be convinced by that circumstance, since it has been convinced by it before.”

“To be frank with you, we do not believe a word of this flimsy nonsense you are talking. Nancy Hopkins has gone astray; she is a disgraced girl, and she knows it and you know it and we all know it. She must not [begin page 58] venture to show her face among our virtuous daughters; we will not allow it. If you wish to marry her and make an honest woman of her, well and good; but take her away from herealteration in the MS, at least till the wind of this great scandal has somewhat blown over.”

So the Hopkinses and the blacksmith shut themselves up in their house, and were shunned and despised by the whole village.

But the day of their sorrow was to have an end, in time. They felt it, they knew it, in truth, for their dreams said it. So they waited, and were patient. Meantime the marvelous tale spread abroad; village after village heard of the new Virginemendation and the new Christ, and presently the matter traveled to the regions of newspapers and telegraphs; then instantly it swept the world as upon myriad wings, and was talked of in all lands.

So at last came certain wise men from the far east, to inquire concerning the matter, and to learn for themselves whether the tale was true or false. These were editors from New York and other great cities, and presidentsalteration in the MS of Yale and Princeton and Andover and other great colleges. They saw a star shining in the east—it was Venus—and this they resolved to follow. Several astronomers said that a star could not be followed—that a person might as well try to follow a spot on the sun's disk, or any other object that was so far away it could not be seen to move.alteration in the MS Other astronomers said that if a star should come down low enough to be valuable as a guide, it would roof the whole earth in, and make total darkness and give forth no relieving light itself—and that then it would be just as useful, as a guide, as is the eternal roof of the Mammoth Cave to the explorer of its maze of halls and chambers. And they also said that a star could not descend thus low without disorganizing the universe and hurling all the worlds together in confusion.

But the wise men were not disturbed. They answered that what had happened once could happen again. And they were right. For this talk had hardly ended when Venus did actually leave her place in the sky and come down and hang over the very building in which the sages were assembled. She gave out a good light, too, and appeared to be no larger than a full moon.

The wise men were greatly rejoiced; and they gathered together their baggage, and their editorialalteration in the MS passes, and clerical half-rate tickets, and [begin page 59] took the night train westwardalteration in the MS praising Godalteration in the MS. In the morning they stopped at Pittsburg and laid over till Venus was visible again in the evening. And so they journeyed on, night after night. At Louisville they got news of the child's birth. That night they resumed their journey; and so continued, by rail and horse conveyance, following the star until it came and stood over the house in Black Jack where the young child lay. Then the star retired into the sky, and they saw it go back and resumealteration in the MS its glimmering function in the remote east.

It was about dawn, now; and immediately the whole heavens were filled with flocks of descending angels, and these were joined by a choir of drovers who were ranching in the vicinity, and all broke forth into song—the angels using a tune of their own, and the others an Arkansasalteration in the MS tune, but all employing the same words. The wise men assisted, as well as they could, until breakfast time; then the angels returned home, the drovers resumed business, and the wise men retired to the village tavern.

After breakfast, the wise men being assembled privately, the President of Princeton made a brief speech and offered this suggestion:

1.      That they all go, in a body, to see the child and hear the evidence;
2.      That they all question the witnesses andalteration in the MS assist in sifting the testimony;
3.      But that the verdict be voted and rendered, not byalteration in the MS the full body, but by a jury selected out of it by ballot.

Mr. Greeleyalteration in the MS, Mr. Bennett and Mr. Beach saw no good reason for this. They said the whole body was as good a jury as a part of it could be.

Thealteration in the MS President of Princeton replied that the proposed method would simplify matters.

A vote was then taken and the measure carried, in spite of the editorial opposition.

The President of Andover then proposed that the jury consist of six persons, and that only members of some orthodox church be eligiblealteration in the MS.

Against this the editors loudly protested, and remarked that this would make a packed jury and rule out every editor, since none of their faction would be eligible. Mr. Greeleyalteration in the MS implored the President of Andover to relinquish his proposition; and reminded him that the church [begin page 60] had always been accused of packing juries and using other underhand methods wherever its interests seemed to be concerned; and reminded him, further, as an instance, that church trials of accused clergymen nearly always resulted in aalteration in the MS barefaced whitewashing of the accused. He begged that the present opportunity to improve the church's reputation would not be thrown away, but that a fair jury, selected without regard to religious opinion or complexion might be chosen.

The plea failed, however, and a jury composed solely of church members was chosen, the church faction being largely in the majority and voting as a unit. The editors were grieved over the advantage which had been taken of their numerical weakness, but they couldalteration in the MS not help themselves.

Then the wise men arose and went in a body to see the Hopkinses. There they listened to the evidence offered by Nancy and Barnes; and when the testimony was all in, it was examined and discussed. The religious faction maintained that it was clear, coherent, cogent, andalteration in the MS without flaw, discrepancy, oralteration in the MS doubtful feature; but the editorial faction stoutly maintained the directly opposite view, and implored the jury to consider well, and not allow their judgment to be influenced by prejudice and what might seem to be ecclesiastical interest.

The jury then retired; and after a brief absence brought in a verdict, as follows:alteration in the MS

“We can doubt noemendation whit.alteration in the MS We find these to be the facts:alteration in the MS An angel informed Nancy Hopkinsalteration in the MS of what was to happen; this is shown by her unqualified declaration. She is still a virgin; we know this is so, because we have her word for it. The child is the actual child of Almighty God—a fact established by overwhelming testimony, to-wit, the testimony of the angel, of Nancy, and of God Himselfemendation, as delivered to Jacksonalteration in the MS Barnes in a dream. Our verdictalteration in the MS, then, is that this child is truly the Christ the Son of God, that his birth is miraculous, and that his mother is still a virgin.”

Thenalteration in the MS the jury and their factionalteration in the MS fell upon their knees and worshiped the child, and laid at its feet costly presents: namely, a History of the Church's Dominion During the First Fourteen Centuries; a History of the Presbyterian Dominion in Scotland; a History of Catholic Dominion in England; a History of the Salem Witchcraft; a History of the [begin page 61] Holy Inquisition; in addition, certain toys for the child to play with—these being tiny models oftextual note the Inquisition's instruments of torture; and a little Holy Bible with the decent passages printed in red ink.

But the other wise men, the editors, murmured andalteration in the MS were not satisfied. Mr. Horace Greeley delivered their opinion. He said:

“Where an individual's life is at stake, hearsay evidence is not received in courts; how, then, shall we venture to receive hearsay evidence in this case, where the eternal life of whole nations is at stake? We have hearsay evidence that an angel appeared; nonealteration in the MS has seen that angel but one individual, and she an interested person. We have hearsay evidence that thealteration in the MS angelemendation delivered a certain message; whether it has come to us untampered with or not, we can never know, there being none to convey it to us but a party interested in having it take a certain form. We have the evidence of dreams and other hearsay evidencealteration in the MS—and still, as before, from interested parties—that God is the father of this child, and that its mother remains a virgin: the first a statement which never has been and never will be possible of verification, and the last a statement which could only have been verified before the child's birth, but not having been done then can never hereafter be done. Silly dreams, and the unverifiable twaddle of a family of nobodies who are interested in covering up a youngalteration in the MS girl's accident and shielding her from disgrace—such is the ‘evidence!’ ‘Evidence’ like this could not affect even a dog's case, in any court in Christendom. It is rubbish, it is foolishness. No court would listen to it;alteration in the MS it would be an insult to judge and jury to offer it.”

Then a young man of the other party, named Talmage, rose in a fury of generous enthusiasm, and denounced the last speaker as a reprobate and infidel, and said he hadalteration in the MS earned and would receive his right reward in the fulness of time in that everlasting hell created and appointed for his kind by this holy child, the God of the heavens and the earth and all that in them is. Then he sprang high in the air three times, cracking his heels together and praising God. And when he had finally alighted and become in a measure stationary, he shouted in a loud voice, saying:

“Here is divine evidence, evidence from the lips of very God Himself, and it is scoffed at! here is evidence from an angel of God, coming [begin page 62] fresh from the fields of heaven, from the shadow of the Throne, with the odors of Eternal Land upon his raiment, and it is derided! here is evidence from God's own chosen handmaid, holy and pure, whom Heemendation has fructified without sin, and it is mocked at! here is evidence of one who has spoken face to face with the Most High in a dream, and even his evidence is called lies and foolishness! and on top of all, here is cumulative evidence: for the fact that all these things have happened before, in exactly the same way, establishes the genuineness of this second happening beyond shadow or possibility of doubt to all minds not senile, idiotic or given hopelessly over to the possession of hell and the devil! If men cannot believe these evidences, taken together, and piled, Pelion on Ossa, mountains high, what can they believe!”

Then the speakeralteration in the MS flung himself down, with many contortions, and wallowed in the dirt before the child, singing praises and glorifying God.


The Holy Family remained at Black Jack, and in time the world ceased to talk about them, and they were forgotten.

But at the end of thirty years they came again into notice; for news went abroad that Jesus had begun to teach in the churches, and to do miracles. He appointed twelve disciples, and theyalteration in the MS went about proclaimingalteration in the MS Christ's kingdom and doing good. Many of the people believed, and confessed their belief; and in time these became a multitude. Indeed there was a likelihood that by and by all the nation would come into the fold, for the miracles wrought were marvelous, and men found themselves unable to resist such evidences. But after a while there came a day when murmurings began to be heard, and dissatisfaction to show its head. And the cause of this was the very same cause which had worked the opposite effect, previously,—namely, the miracles. The first notable instance was on this wise:

One of the twelve disciples—the same being that Talmage heretofore referred to—was tarrying for a time in Tumblinsonville, healing the sick and teaching in the public places of the village. It was summer, and all the land was parched with a drouth which had lasted during three months. The usual petitions had been offered up, daily at the hearth-stone and on Sundays from the pulpit, but without result— [begin page 63] the rain did not come. The governor finallyalteration in the MS issued his proclamation for a season of fasting and united prayer for rain, naming a certain Sunday for the beginning. St. Talmage sat with the congregation in the Tumblinsonville church that Sunday morning. There wastextual note not a cloud in the sky; it was blistering hot; everybody was sad; the preacher said, mournfully, that it was now plain that the rain was withheld for a punishment, and it would be wisest to ask for it no more for the present. At that moment the saint rose up and rebuked the minister before the whole wondering assemblage, for his weak and faltering faith; then he put his two hands together, lifted up his face, and began to pray for rain. With his third sentence an instant darkness came, and with it a pouring deluge! Perhaps one may imagine the faces of the people—it is a thing which cannot be described. The blessed rain continued to come down in torrents all day long, and the happy people talked of nothing but the miracle. Indeed, they were so absorbed in it that it was midnight before they woke up to a sense of the fact that this rain, which began as a blessing, had gradually turned into a calamity—the country was flooded, the whole region was well nigh afloat. Everybody turned out and tried to save cattle, hogs, and bridges; and at this work they wrought despairingly and uselessly two or three hours before it occurred to anybody that if that disciple's prayer had brought the deluge, possibly another prayer from him might stop it. Some hurried away and called up the disciple out of his bed, and begged him to stay the flood if he could. He told them to cease from their terrors and bear witness to what was about to happen. He then knelt and offered up his petition. The answer was instantaneous; the rain stopped immediately and utterly.

There was rejoicing in all religious hearts, because the unbelieving had always scoffed at prayer and said the pulpit had claimed that it could accomplish everything, whereas none could prove that it was able to accomplish anything at all. Unbelievers had scoffed when prayers were offered up for better weather, and for the healing of the sick, and the staying of epidemics, and the averting of war—prayers which no living man had ever seen answered, they said. But the holy disciple had shown,alteration in the MS now, that special providences were at the bidding of the prayers of the perfect. The evidence was beyond dispute.

[begin page 64]

But on the other hand there was a widespread discontent among such of the community as had had their all swept away by the flood. It was a feeling which was destined to find a place, later, in other bosoms.

When but a few days had gone by, certain believers came and touched the hem of the disciple's garment and begged that once more he would exert his miraculous powers in the name of Him whom he and they served and worshiped. They desired himtextual note to pray for cold weather, for the benefit of a poor widow who was perishing of a wasting fever. He consented; and althoughemendation it was midsummer, ice formed, and there was a heavy fall of snow. The woman immediately recovered. The destructionalteration in the MS of crops by the cold and snow was complete; in addition, a great many persons who were abroad and out of the way of help had their ears and fingers frostbittenemendation, and six children and two old men fell by the wayside, being benumbed by the cold and confused and blinded by the snow, and were frozen to death. Wherefore, although numbers praised God for the miracle, and marveled at it, the relatives and immediate friends of the injured and the killed were secretly discontented, and some of them even gave voice to murmurs.

Now came divers of the elect, praising God,alteration in the MS and asked for further changes of the weather, for one reason or another, and the holy disciple, glad to magnify his Lord, willingly gratified them. The calls became incessant. As a consequence, hetextual note changed the weather many times, every day. These changes were very trying to the general public, and caused much sickness and death, since alternate drenchings and freezings and scorchings were common, and none could escape colds, in consequence, neither could any ever know, upon going out, whether to wear muslin or furs. A man who dealt in matters of science and had long had a reputation as a singularly accurate weather prophet, found himself utterly baffled by this extraordinary confusion of weather; and his business being ruined, he presently lost his reason and endeavored to take the life of the holy discipleemendation. Eventually so much complaint was made that the saint was induced, by a general petition, to desist, and leave the weather alone. Yet there were many that protested, and were not able to see why they should not be allowed to have prayers offered up for weather to suit their private interests—a thing, they said, which had been done in all ages, and been encouraged by the pulpit, too, un- [begin page 65] til now, when such prayers were found to be worth something. There was a degree of reasonableness in the argument, but it plainly would not answer to listen to it.

An exceedingly sickly season followed the confused and untimely weather, and every house became a hospital. The holy Talmageemendation was urged to interfere with prayer. He did so. The sickness immediately disappeared, and no one was unwell in the slightest degree, during three months. Then the physicians, undertakers and professional nurses of all the region round about rose in a body and made such an outcry that the saint was forced to modify the state of things. He agreed to pray in behalf of special cases, only. Now a young man presently fell sick, and when he was dying his mother begged hard for his life, and the saint yielded, and by his prayers restoredemendation him to immediate health. The next day he killed a comrade in a quarrel, and shortly was hanged for it. His mother never forgave herself for procuring the plans of God to be altered. By request of another mother, another dying son was prayed back to health, but it was not a fortunate thing; for he strangely forsook his blameless ways, and in a few months was in a felon's cell for robbing his employer, and his family were broken hearted and longing for death.alteration in the MS

By this time the miracles of the Savior himself were beginning to fall under criticism. He had raised many poor people from the dead; and as long as he had confined himself to the poor these miracles brought large harvests of glory and converts, and nobody found fault, or even thought of finding fault. But a change came at last. A richtextual note bachelor died in a neighboring town, leaving a will giving all his property to the Society for the Encouragement of Missions. Several days after the burial, an absent friend arrived home, and learning of the death, came to Black Jack, and prevailed with the Savior to pray him back to life and health. So the man was alive again, but found himself a beggar; the Society had possession of all his wealth and legal counsel warned the officers of the Society that if they gave it up they would be transcending their powers and the Society could come on them for damages in the full amount, and they would unquestionably be obliged to pay. The officers started to say something about Lazarus, but the lawyer said that if Lazarus left any property behind him he most cer- [begin page 66] tainly found himself penniless when he was raised from the dead; that if there was any dispute between him and his heirs, the law upheld the latter. Naturally, the Society decided to hold on to the man's property. There was an aggravating lawsuit; the Society proved that the man had been dead and been buried; the court dismissed the case, saying it could not consider the complaints of a corpse. The matter was appealed; the higher court sustained the lower one. It went further, and said that for a dead man to bring a suit was a thing without precedent, a violation of privilege, and hence was plainly contempt of court—whereupon it laid a heavy fine upon the transgressor.emendation Maddened by these misfortunes, the plaintiff killed the presiding officer of the Society and then blew his own brains out, previously giving warning that if he was disturbed again he would make it a serious matter for the disturber.

The Twelve Disciples were the constant though innocent cause of trouble. Every blessing they brought down upon an individual was sure to fetch curses in its train for other people. Gradually the several communities among whom they labored grew anxious and uneasy; these prayers had unsettled everything; they had so disturbed the order of nature, that nobody could any longer guess, one day, what was likely to happen the next. So theemendation popularity of the Twelve wasted gradually away. The people murmured against them, and said they were a pestilent incumbrance and a dangerous power to have in the State. During the time that they meddled with the weather, they made just one friend every time they changed it, and not less than a hundred enemies—a thing which was natural, and to be expected.—When they agreed to let the weather and the public health alone, their popularityemendation seemed regained, for a while, but they soon lost it once more, through indiscretions. To accommodate a procession, they prayed that the river might be divided; this prayer was answered, and the procession passed over dry-shod. The march consumed twenty minutes, only, but twentyalteration in the MS minutes was ample time to enable the backed-up waters to overflow all the country for more than a hundred and fifty miles up the river, on both sides; in consequence of which a vast number of farms and villages were ruined, many lives were lost, immense aggregations of live stock destroyed, and thousands of people reduced to beggary. The disciples had to be spirited away and kept concealed for two or three months, [begin page 67] after that, so bitter was the feeling against them, and so widespread the desire to poison or hang them.

In the course of time so many restrictions came to be placed upon the disciples' prayers, by public demand, that they were at last confined to two things, raisingemendation the dead and restoring the dying to health. Yet at times even these services produced trouble, and sometimes as great in degree as in the case of the rich bachelor who was raised by the Savior. A very rich old man, with a host of needy kin, was snatched from the very jaws of death by the disciples, and given a long lease of life. The needy kin were not slow to deliver their opinions about what they termed “this outrage;” neither were they mild or measured in their abuse of the holy Twelve. Almost every time a particularly disagreeable person died, his relatives had the annoyance of seeing him walk into their midst again within a week. Often, when such a person was about to die, half the village would be in an anxious and uncomfortable state, dreading the interference of the disciples, each individual hoping they would let nature take its course but none being willing to assume the exceedingly delicate office of suggesting it.

However, a time came at last when people were forced to speak. The region had been cursed, for many years, by the presence of a brute named Marvin, who was a thief, liar, drunkard, blackguard, incendiary, a loathsome and hateful creature in every way. One day the news went about that he was dying. The public joy was hardly concealed. Everybody thought of the disciples in a moment, (for they would be sure to raise him up in the hope of reforming him,) but it was too late. A dozen men started in the direction of Marvin's house, meaning to stand guard there and keep the disciples away; but they were too late; the prayer had been offered, and they met Marvin himself, striding down the street, hale and hearty, and good for thirty years more.

An indignation meeting was called, and there was a packed attendance. It was difficult to maintain order, so excited were the people. Intemperate speeches were made, and resolutions offered in which the disciples were bitterly denounced. Among the resolutions finally adopted were these:

Resolved, That the promise “Ask and ye shall receive” shall henceforth be accepted as sound in theory, and true; but it shall stop there; [begin page 68] whosoever ventures to actually follow the admonition shall suffer death.

Resolved, That to pray for the restoration of the sick; for the averting of war; for the blessing of rain; and for other special providences, were things righteous and admissible whilst they were mere forms and yielded no effect; but henceforth, whosoever shall so pray shall be deemed guilty of crime and shall suffer death.

Resolved, That if the ordinary prayers of a nation were answered during a single day, the universal misery, misfortune, destruction and desolation which would ensue, would constitute a cataclysm which would take its place side by side with the deluge and so remain in history to the end of time.

Resolved, That whosoever shall utter his belief in special providences in answer to prayer, shall be adjudged insane and shall be confined.

Resolved, That the Supreme Being is able to conduct the affairs of this world without the assistance of any person in Arkansas; and whosoever shall venture to offer such assistance shall suffer death.

Resolved, That since no one can improve the Creator's plans by procuring their alteration, there shall be but one form of prayer allowed in Arkansas henceforth, and that form shall begin and end with the words, “Lord, Thy emendation will, not mine, be done;” and whosoever shall add to or take from this prayer, shall perish at the stake.

During several weeks the holy disciplesemendation observed these laws, and things moved along, in nature, in a smooth and orderly way which filled the hearts of the harassed people with the deepest gratitude; but at last the Twelve made the sun and moon stand still ten or twelve hours once, to accommodate a sheriff's posse who were trying to exterminate a troublesome band of tramps. The result was frightful. The tides of the ocean being released from the moon's control, burst in one mighty assault upon the shores of all the continents and islands of the globe and swept millions of human beings to instant death. The Savior and the disciples, being warned by friends, fled to the woods, but they were hunted down, one after the other, by the maddened populace, and crucified. With the exception of St. Talmage. For services rendered the detectives, he was paid thirty pieces of silver and his life spared. Thus ended the Second Advent, a.d. 1881.alteration in the MS

Editorial Emendations The Second Advent
  forerunners ●  forerunners,
  abundance ●  abundace
  Him ●  him Also emended at 64.6
  accent? ●  accent.
  Virgin ●  virgin
  no ●  no no
  Himself ●  himself Also emended at 61.35
  the angel ●  The angel
  He ●  he
  although ●  Although
  frostbitten ●  frosbitten
  holy disciple ●  Holy disciple
  holy Talmage ●  Holy Talmage
  restored ●  rostored
  transgressor. ●  transgressor See Mark Twain's revisions for “The Holy Children,” 74.36
  So the ●  So The
  popularity ●  popularity,
  raising ●  rasing
  Thy  ●  thy
  holy disciples ●  Holy disciples
Alterations in the Manuscript The Second Advent
 are rickety] ‘are’ follows a wiped-out comma; written over wiped-out ‘out’.
 Nancy] follows canceled ‘M’.
 and] interlined with a caret in pencil.
 Barnes answered] interlined with a caret and marked to begin a paragraph with a paragraph sign in dark blue ink.
 act] originally ‘fact’; the ‘f’ canceled.
 facts] originally ‘fact’; the ‘s’ added.
 like] written over wiped-out ‘wit’.
 assured] interlined with a caret above canceled ‘warned’.
 Nancy] follows canceled ‘her’.
 world.] followed by canceled quotation marks.
 it?”] the question mark squeezed in.
 cheaper] follows canceled ‘so’.
 angel.] followed by canceled quotation marks.
 is holy] follows canceled ‘will’.
 reinstituted] follows canceled ‘decided’.
 here] interlined with a caret in black ink above canceled ‘her’.
 presidents] follows canceled ‘profes’.
 move.] the ‘ve’ written over a wiped-out unrecovered letter.
 editorial] interlined with a caret.
 westward] follows canceled ‘for the’.
 praising God] interlined with a caret.
 and resume] follows canceled ‘and take’.
 Arkansas] follows canceled ‘ear’.
 After . . . follows:] added on seven new MS pages, 34A-G, replacing a paragraph: ‘After breakfast the wise men went to see the Hopkinses; there they listened critically to the evidence offered by Nancy and Barnes, and watched narrowly for possible discrepancies, but the college presidents detected none. When the evidence was all in, the wise men examined it on all sides, but the college presidents were still unable to find any flaw in it. At last they said—’. The first part of the paragraph, ‘After . . . watched nar-’, inadvertently not canceled at the bottom of MS page 34; the remainder canceled in light blue ink on page 35; in the original paragraph ‘detected’ follows canceled ‘foun’; ‘the college presidents’ interlined with a caret in black ink both times it appears.
 and] interlined with a caret.
 not by] follows canceled ‘by’.
 Greeley] originally ‘Greely’; the ‘y’ mended to ‘ey’.
 The] the ‘T’ mended from ‘P’.
 eligible] follows canceled ‘qu’.
 Greeley] originally ‘Greely’; the ‘y’ mended to ‘ey’.
 a] interlined with a caret.
 could] follows canceled ‘had’.
 and] interlined with a caret.
 or] written over a wiped-out ‘b’.
 no whit.] originally ‘no longer.’; ‘longer.’ canceled and ‘no whit.’ interlined; the first ‘no’ inadvertently left standing.
 We find . . . facts:] interlined.
 Hopkins] interlined with a caret.
 Jackson] interlined with a caret in light blue ink.
 verdict] follows canceled ‘tes’.
 Then] follows canceled ‘B’.
 the jury . . . faction] originally ‘they’; the ‘y’ canceled and ‘jury . . . faction’ interlined with a caret in light blue ink.
 murmured and] interlined with a caret.
 none] written over wiped-out ‘and d’.
 We . . . that the] ‘We . . . that’ interlined with a caret; the ‘T’ of ‘The’ not reduced to ‘t’.
 hearsay evidence] followed by canceled ‘that’.
 a young] follows canceled ‘the’.
 to it;] the semicolon mended from a period.
 had] follows canceled ‘would have’.
 speaker] followed by a canceled comma.
 they] interlined with a caret.
 proclaiming] follows canceled ‘ins’.
 finally] interlined with a caret above canceled ‘had’.
 There was . . . shown,] adapted from “The Holy Children.”
 to pray . . . destruction] adapted from “The Holy Children.”
 praising God,] interlined with a caret.
 changed . . . death.] adapted from “The Holy Children.”
 bachelor . . . 1881.] adapted from “The Holy Children.”
 twenty . . . twenty] originally ‘twenty . . . twenty’; both words canceled and ‘ten’ interlined above each in light blue ink; then each ‘ten’ canceled and ‘twenty’ interlined with a caret in light blue ink.
Textual Notes The Second Advent
 models of] In the top margin of the manuscript page above these words Mark Twain wrote and canceled the cue word “Talmage.”
 There was] The manuscript pages adapted from “The Holy Children” begin here.
 now, that . . . desired him] One and a half new manuscript pages were added here to the pages adapted from “The Holy Children.” Mark Twain had first changed “evidences were . . . and” to “evidence was” (p. 63.36) on the “Holy Children” page. He then enlarged the scope of the alteration by canceling the entire surrounding passage (“Holy Children” p. 73.7–13) and replacing it with the new pages. The first few lines of the canceled passage, including the revised phrase, were copied unchanged on the new pages (“now, that . . . dispute,” p. 63.35–36).
 of crops . . . consequence, he] One and a half new manuscript pages were added here to the pages adapted from “The Holy Children.”
 By this time . . . A rich] One new manuscript page was added here to the pages adapted from “The Holy Children.”