If you don’t think this is a nice kettle of fish, you don’t know anything about fish, Livy my darling. From 3 oclock yesterday till 12 last night I put in a good part of the time questioning & cross-questioning the servants (including Patrick & wife) & the Chief of Police. The chief of police & his detectives have a “theory,” of course: to wit—George1explanatory note is preparing to gut the house & throw the crime upon imaginary burglars. I hadve done so much jaw & listened to so much jaw that when I went to bed I made two resolutions to make a choice from, & then dismissed the subject & took my whisky. Now I have awakened refreshed & shall presently get up.

IⒶemendation find myself “set” in the opinion I went to bed with: there has been no burglar in the house, but only one or both of l Lizzie’s two loafers. Here is some of the testimony I have taken: The alarm went off very early one morning, before we went away; it was Lizzie’s Willie going out of the basement door; George saw this. George, Patrick, & the two Marys & Rosa2explanatory note all believed Willy was sleeping with Lizzy her occasionally here in the house, before we went away. I It is believed that he was the “burglar” of last Thursday night. (I believe the “burglar” of Friday to be an imaginary one, invented by littl Lizzy.) Mrs. Perkins3explanatory note has seen two persons resembling L’s loafers, enter the house at noonday. Patrick & Mary have seen Lizzy sitting on the balcony of the N. E. room with her loafer in the daytime, & been scoffed at by them. The two loafers played billiards all day, 4th July, on my table. George hid the balls that night & Lizzy complained about it next day, accusing George of favoring his own friends with the game—the which George makes oath to be untrue. George testifies that he one day saw Patrick wearing my walking-shoes; asked where he got them; he said Lizzy gave them to him with the remark that I had ordered that they be given to a tramp or anybody that might want them.

I have questioned

I shall question Lizzy once more, privately, this morning; if she denies these things, I will confront her with all the witnesses. If she gives notice or I discharge her (the latter is what I would do if [I] was sure you would approve), she must leave here before I do, & I shall search her trunk immediately after the conversation. I’ve got a special officer in the house nights till I get home & consult with you.

I believe in George & the cook, & Patrick, very thoroughly—but I haven’t heard this morning’s testimony, yet, you see. George, Lizzy & Mary all agree that the 3 ruffians of July 4 who used insulting yells & cries with my name in them, did it from the street, totally without provocation or any of our people being in sight; they kept it up half an hour; then George shot at them twice, but unluckily failed to get them; they threatened him, then, & he went down in the yard & very gallantly defied the gang.

I haven’t had so much chin-chin for some years. Charley Warner told me everything, down town, before I came out, so I thought that I have enjoyed it very much; I am judge, jury, & lawyer for both sides. Moreover, the Court of Appeals being in Elmira, I have p a pretty swinging jurisdiction here, & it sets me up & makes me feel my oats.

Had a pleasant short visit at the Perkins’sⒶemendation yesterday evening, & a rattling time at Twichell’s.

I love you my darling; ever so much I love you; I love you & I miss you—& yet it chuckles me with comfort to be in this big authority for once.